Change is inevitable. However, in my life, I seem to follow a sort of holding pattern for years at a time, and then changes hit fast and furiously, all at once.
I am not sure if I create this pattern through my own subconscious, or…? Regardless, it’s clear that now seems to be the time for one of these change-storms.
I’m on the path (albeit stumbling!) of veganism again, or at the very least, a much healthier diet with fewer processed foods. I’ve made a commitment to putting my family first, and to being a patient, gentle and respectful parent.
Earlier today, I was watching Disney channel with my kids, and we got to talking about childism in action on that channel.
In particular, the show Good Luck Charlie. It’s about a “big” family (four kids), but the parents are self-absorbed, hapless idiots and they are constantly making comments that indicate that they would rather not have had kids.
I am all for jokes and sarcasm, but IMO there’s a line that these shows cross, and I think it’s hurtful. Why do we want to perpetuate a cultural opinion of kids as a hassle or an inconvenience? How is that helping the relationships between parents and children?
I’ve been in an altogether different headspace over the past few weeks, which is to be expected what with my mother’s passing, our move, rearranged living circumstances, etc.
I’m listening to a song right now (Okay, it’s Panic! At the Disco!) that just sang the line, “Hey kid, you’ll never leave this town,” and it’s a funny coincidence because I was always afraid of being that kid.
The kid who’d be agonizingly stuck in Middle-o-Nowhere, Texas, with a perpetual “present tense” that never changed. Continue reading
Yes, I said “beyond” religion. I am not a fan of the concept that there is only one right way, which is central to so many major religions.
I’m very much a freethinker in that regard, and I raise my kids to be freethinkers as well.
As a parent and as a homeschooler, I don’t want to shield them from the world–or religion. We approach religions of all sorts from a place of finding the commonalities, instead of focusing on the differences.
I also want to offer my kids the opportunity to be culturally literate in terms of religion–to think critically about the information they get from the world.
Most importantly, I want them to be in touch with what they feel in their hearts, and whether any form of organized religion speaks to them. I don’t view beliefs as something external that one should try to conform to, but rather, something that is already inside oneself, waiting to be discovered and given words to.
When I wrote this, back in 2011, I had a major aversion to capitalizing things. Forgive me.
I think many parents tend to view their kids as an extension of themselves, as an embodiment of their values, or evidence that they believe/do/feel the right things.. but that’s not really healthy or fair to think of kids that way. Our children are unique beings from day one–or as Khalil Gibran puts it, our children are not ours.
If other people think that your child not knowing how to do fractions yet, or disliking their hair to be combed, MEANS SOMETHING NEGATIVE about you as a parent, well…let them think.
Their opinions of you as a parent or of your children do not matter.
As I watch my sweet oldest boy turn more and more into what some might call an angsty teenager – I recall mySelf at his age.
Not so long ago, I was his age….and not long after that, I was pregnant and giving birth to him.
I was 18 the year he was born. The only child of only children, I’d never been around kids, never babysat.
I only ever held a baby once, briefly and awkwardly, before I held my own precious child.
May 1 2006 – a long time ago in another reality…
when nearly every person in my world was either abusive, or also being abused – or most likely, both.
Thinking Deep Thoughts again. Really not healthy to think rather than sleep. Continue reading